Tuesday, January 26, 2016

The Triangle Of Disdain

The Triangle of Disdain
Today's story deviates from train-related material, but it's still about commuting and getting around New York City.

As some of you know, I'm a recent Citi Bike convert. It's a fantastic New York City quality of life improvement. If Citi Bike were a religious cult, I'd wear a robe, shave my head, and live at the airport. I'd hand out flowers, gear shift knobs, and pamphlets to travelers.

Given the amount of time in Manhattan I spend 1) walking, 2) biking, and 3) occasionally driving, I've noticed a personal behavior pattern. Whichever method I'm using, I have great hostility for those doing the other two.

I call this behavior pattern the "Triangle of Disdain." While trying to get from point A to point B, the "green ball of grouchiness," represented by Oscar the Grouch, falls somewhere on the triangle.

I suspect I'm not unique. Let's have a look at how it works.

Thursday, January 21, 2016

Gas Mask Guy

The interesting Penn Station person of the day is Gas Mask Guy. Gas Mask Guy sweeps the very busy Amtrak men's room wearing a mask. He works mornings. I wonder what the hell I'm breathing when I use the facilities.

Never mind. I don't want to know.

Wednesday, January 20, 2016

Come Here Often to Repent?

Stood on the corner of 34th and 7th this evening, trying to get to Penn Station. A “Repent Ye Now” guy stood with his tall sign and warned us all of impending doom. In between fervent claims of eternal hellfire and misery, he lowered his voice and attempted to flirt with women passing by.

I wonder what his God would think of that.

Tuesday, January 19, 2016

Thursday, January 14, 2016

Guest Post: One Man Anti-Terrorism Force

Today's TTIV story is a guest post that is part bizarre behavior and part sociological oddity. It comes from "The Duke of Albany." He's not really a Duke, and he's not from Albany, but TTIV protects the identities of contributors with Shakespearean character names. 

 In 2015, the Duke shared a great story about the frightening Hicksville parking facility traffic director, who I nicknamed "Edgar Wrentilkoppe." This one's about a LIRR rider with grand delusions. 

One morning, I got on a Brooklyn-bound Long Island Rail Road train at Deer Park. As is typical of non-Manhattan bound trains, it was quiet with ample seating. The silence was shattered though, as a "Chatty Cathy" contingent boarded my train car. They clustered together in the six-seater, facing each other, two rows away from me.  There were three women and one man. To further the visualization, imagine the most stereotypical Lawn Guyland accents you've ever heard.

To top it off, they had a LOT to say.

Friday, January 01, 2016